Ho

I forgot to post this last week (before the holiday).

I leave you with this:

Yes, that is my dog.  Yes, he is wearing a Santa hat.  And yes, he is PISSED about it.

Hope everyone had a safe and fabulous holiday!

Why?

I've had person after person ask me why I "check in" via yelp or why I review or why I don't do these things (ie:  review) for a living.

I really don't have an answer for that, except for...I'm pretty sure it won't pay me what I want, but if money weren't an object, I'd probably do it for a living.  I mean, why not?  How about that for a roundabout answer?  Hmm?  Hmmm?

I review places because I, quite frankly, have an opinion, and would like the public to know.  Why wouldn't I warn people of a restaurant where the cook sneezes into her hands and then puts those same hands in a bowl of noodles?  Ewww.  Why wouldn't I want people to know that there's a restaurant that has great service, great food, and great prices, or that there's a venue that's absolutely magical and my friends, who were looking for such a place, should get married there?  Why would I NOT share that information?  With everyone?  

We get out a lot, I admit that - to restaurants, bars, events at different venues.  Each one, in my humble opinion, has a little bit o' something that needs to be shared with the general public (that would be YOU).  

So yeah, that's why I review.  That and I get to go to some pretty cool events where there's food, booze, shwag, great people (watching), plus networking...for free.  All so I can write my tiny little opinion about it later in hopes that it generates some business (or not).

Does this make you want to write reviews?  If even a little bit?  :)

I'm a caretaker

I'm a caretaker.  Just like it says in the title.  That is what I am.  There's a reason why people call me "Mother".  It has nothing to do with the CIA.  At all.  Turns out.

I watch out for everyone.  I can't help that.  I can't stand seeing my friends upset or hurt because oddly enough, I physically feel their pain.  I can't handle it when an employee is having a meltdown and everyone else is standing around with their mouths open, wondering what to do - I have to do something about it.  I shed a tear when I see an animal that's been abused (humane society ads be damned!).  I am very passionate about things that have nothing to do with me.
 

I want to make the world safer for my family, my friends, my friends' families, their pets (yes, cats included).  I wish there was more I could do.

But I am one person.  And I can only do so much.

So why am I in the position I'm in now?  

Good question.

I do not know.

I should be a counselor, a nurse, an EMT, a therapist.  

I am only a massage therapist.

I am only a human resources robot.

But...I am a caretaker.

And I can't change that.

I have an opinion

This past weekend was Seacompression - which is Seattle's version of Burningman decompression parties.
I don't know why I bother going.  I really don't.  Especially when Portland's Burnout and San Francisco's decompression parties are so...GOOD.
I understand there are dozens of volunteers that put in their time & energy in creating Seacompression - I GET IT - you don't need to lecture me on this aspect - I've thrown plenty of events in this town and in other cities as well.  But man alive...how it tends to not be...that good year after year is completely beyond me. 

Case in point:
The space - everyone knows that the hangar at Sandpoint Magnusson Park has the worst feng shui on the planet.  There's no rhyme or reason at this venue.  People are running into each other the whole event.
And who are these suspension people taking up half the hangar?  Why?  Half the time they weren't even doing anything.  
Why weren't there more stilters?  Why was the only marching band, which is one I adore, Titanium Sporkestra?  Where were some of the others?
Where were the art cars?
Also, the good folks who rent this space out to burners like to shut down EARLY. 2am?  Really?  Where ARE we?  No burner event wants to be shut down at 2am - they want to go all night...sometimes til dawn or beyond.  (thank you Hippos, for throwing an after party - the community loves you!)
The music - there are really good sounds and there are sounds that are questionable.  DJ's that are consistently good?  Michael Manahan.  Everyone else?  Uhhhh...I can't really say, b/c I inevitably leave after 5 minutes of their sets.

Seacompression is not really like the playa, despite what you might be thinking.  Maybe the costumes, but the atmosphere itself?  No way.  The playa is amazing.  Seacompression?  Not quite.

After speaking to some people that were there last nite I realized that at least 45-50% of them had never been to Burningman and never will go...which is FUCKING WEIRD to me.  If you're gonna go to a decompression event, then you need to get your ass down there so you can see for yourself what it's really like.  No amount of event attending is gonna do what being there will.  None.

I'm not saying that I don't appreciate the hard work people put into throwing Seacompression, because I do.  I just wish it were...different.  And maybe different means better.

So until then, I will continue to trek to the playa and hit other decomp parties afterwards.

Sorry Seattle, I'm gonna have to pass for now.


**and let the shit talking begin...NOW.

List style

I've been doing a lot of thinking.  And dealing with a lot of different people and issues.  In doing so, I came up with these lists.  Proceed with caution.

Things I Cannot Stand:

- intolerance.  REALLY?  This is surprising?  It shouldn't be.
- stupidity.  That pretty much speaks for itself.
- skinny jeans.  That shit should not have made a comeback.  
- people who can afford to shower, but don't. If I can smell you from across the room, you're gross.  Period.
- delusions of grandeur.  Come on.  If you don't know your subject well, you aren't fooling anyone and you look and sound like an idiot.
- denial.  See comments above.
- laziness.  Seriously.  If you can't find a job to support yourself, don't expect someone else to.  And don't try living off the state just b/c you have a bazillion kids.  You're an asshole.  A lazy one.
- women who think men should support them when they're perfectly capable of working.  You choose not to.  This is also called "laziness" and makes the rest of us women look bad.
- bad grammar.  GET A DICTIONARY AND TAKE A WRITING CLASS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
- people who say they're soooo old at 30.  FUCK.  YOU.  You're not old.  You're gonna pay for my retirement, bitch.
- people who don't pick up their dog's shit.  Imma gonna chase you down w/ one of my little blue bags if you don't pick up after your pet.  
- infidelity.  Pretty sure I don't need to explain this.
- Sarah Palin.  'nuff said.

Things I Heart (besides my family):

- my friends.  You all have unwittingly enriched my life, and for that, I'm thankful.
- my man.  Because he loves me even when I'm a complete dork...and then some.
- Boston terriers.  The world does not have enough of these!
- Boston terriers in sweaters.  *giggles*
- rainbows.  And double rainbows too.
- tea.  100+ flavours...yesssss. 
- gouda cheese.  *swoon*
- fire.  DUH.
- boots.  All of them.  Except for ankle boots from the 80s...GO AWAY.
- movies.  Netflix is my BFF.
- Olympus Spa.  *sigh*
- liberal, open minds.  As if you didn't know this already.
- Burningman.  It's like an amusement park for people like me.
- clothing swaps.  You know I love them!  I love trading clothes w/ my friends!
- Portland.  Of course.
- riding my bike in a skirt.  I wear padded shorts underneath, but it's still so freeing.  All I need is a big sun hat & a mint julep in my hand!  Oh, and a basket w/ flowers in it.
- Mexican food.  I could eat it everyday.  But I don't.  But I could.  
- smart people.  You know why, you geeks & nerds.  It's sex-ay.
- petticoats & bustles.  Perhaps I should've lived in a Victorian era of sorts.  Hmmm...maybe not.
- music & dancing at music festivals.  I'm currently rocking out right now on Pandora and dancing in my seat.
- freedom of choice.  Of course.  Thanks Devo!


What about you?  You haz some to share?

**photo by yours truly.  B'man 2010.

The last teeny tiny bits o' summer

Well, summer is almost gone, even though there's blue sky outside and temperatures hovering around 73 - which works for me!

We had our last bit o' outdoor summer fun'in this past weekend with Decibel Festival happening.
Friday was spent inside a club with no ventilation (you can bet I'll be mentioning that part in my review), listening to Emancipator and Beats Antique, while trying to keep from passing out from the humidity inside.  It was jam packed with about 50% of the people dancing and the other 50% trying to get to and thru the bar for a drink.  You know it's hot when the walls are sweating (blech!).

Saturday we ventured out on the scooter to meet some friends on the front lawn of the Seattle Centre for dB in the park.  When I say "a few" friends, I mean an entire lawn full of people.  It kind of looked like this.  It was a sunny day, the lawn was full of people dancing, laughing, hooping, or just gathering on blankets to hang out.  

It was the perfect end to a not so perfect (weather-wise, that is) summer.

I look forward to more outdoor events come next spring/summer & I'm sure my friends do too!


**Look at how happy we are!  Pic courtesy of my dear friend, Playapixie.
***PS - MY MAMMOGRAMADINGDONG IS CLEAR!  WOOHOO!





 

Mammogramadingdong

Good times, good times had by all.

And by all, I mean me.  

And the chick that was manhandling muh girls.

If you're wondering, yes, I had a mammogram.  Why?  Well, I turned 40 this year (obviously, if you couldn't tell by the title of this blog), so my good ole gynie made me make an appointment to get my boobs smushed. 
It wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be.
Basically, I had to stand two ways (for both sides) - so 4 "pictures" taken. 
Of me boobies.
I have to wait a week for results, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed that nothing turns up.

If you're 40 or about to turn, you should make that appointment too!

 

**photo courtesy of the internets.

My Swan Song

Another burn come & go.  
Another amazing time in the desert, the harsh elements - first rain, then a double rainbow (!!), then the heat, then a dust storm (of course), then freezing cold temps at nite/early morning.
I love(d) all of it.  

My friend Jessica says Burningman is "the most amazing place on earth."  Quite frankly, I have to agree with her.  It's not for everybody, definitely not for people who can't handle being dirty ALL THE TIME or need certain amenities to get thru the day, but for those of us that don't mind, it really is the most amazing place on earth.  You will never see art in the real world that's created just for this event.  You will never see costumes in the real world that are created just for this event (or maybe you will if you live B'man all year round, I suppose) - while Halloween is my favourite holiday EVAR, it just doesn't hold a candle to what I've seen out there.  You will never be around every walk of life beaming with creativity and love...TOGETHER.  You just don't.
You also won't have super fine dust in every crevice of your body all day everyday like you would when you're out there, but that's besides that point.

This was number 6 for me.  Every time I go to B'man I come back wondering what the next year is going to be like.  I'm like a little kid out there - I ride my bike around staring in wonder at "all the cool shit" and everyone that's made the trek...with a big smile on my face.  
I love it.  I really do.
This year was fun, but also hard for me.  
As you may have read from my earlier post, I took my friend's ashes down to be placed at the temple.  I was an emotional rollercoaster that day.  We got to the temple, walked in, and I immediately walked right into this little nook which I knew Cristal would've loved and placed her there, cried my eyes out, then blew her a kiss and told her I'd see her again someday.
From there we rode past the man and back to camp, got ready, and headed out to find some good beats to dance in hers & Shura's honour.  It was a good night.

I named this post "My Swan Song" as this is most likely my last year heading up a fire conclave and (possibly) fire performing in general.  I no longer want to be in charge of rounding up fire performers & hoping we make it into the Great Circle to spin.  No more 3 hour meetings on the playa when I could be running around or hanging out with my camp mates.  Next year, I want to come back as a spectator.  Or, join an existing conclave as just a performer and not as their shin.  Things are changing quickly - we're all getting older, people are getting married, having babies, and there is a younger, hungrier group of performers out there.  I'm content with just watching.  This isn't to say I won't pick up a hoop or a stave and spin it, but for now, I want a break.  Maybe a permanent one.

In any case, if you haven't seen them, here's the public gallery on FB of my pics:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=524609&id=681175190&l=551ef32f20

Enjoy!

Here I Go Again...

So.  Here I am again.  Getting ready to head down to Burningman.  Yet.  Again.

I'm in a bit of a frenzy right now - as we've been out of town a lot, so preparations have kiiiind of gone down the shitter.  NONETHELESS, I will persevere.  I always do.  This is how we do it...and not in a Montell Jordan kinda way either.

This year is going to be especially tough for me as I'm bringing down Cristal's ashes.  You may recall a post from my other blog about Cristal - she was a dear friend of mine that was diagnosed in 2008 with cervical cancer and a year later, passed away.  
She went to the playa with me in 2007 and had the time of her life.  I know she had a ball b/c I hardly saw her out there - she was too busy running around the desert creating her own adventures.  She made tons of friends, connections, and worked part time in accounting while attending massage therapy school (sound familiar?  It should).  She was a beautiful person, a loving being, and cancer took her away.  She was only 32.  

The week before she died, we were hanging out - both her and I on her twin hospital bed - talking about how we were going to go to Burningman together again.  I knew, but didn't expect it to be in this capacity - me taking her down in a tiny little box.  But here we are.  And here I am, getting ready to take (part of) her to the temple this year.  

At dusk, a group of friends will be taking another friend's ashes to the temple on Wednesday.  Another friend taken away by cancer.  I will join those friends with Cristal and we will all walk over together.  We will silently pray, meditate, and send our love to both of these amazing women.  When the sun finally sets, we will go wherever we are pulled to go and dance the night away in honour of Shura & Cristal.  They will be with us in spirit. 
...
As above
So below
...

**photo for Cristal, she loved mushrooms

Eeeeeeeeee

I've been trying to take better care of myself as of late - biking more, yoga more, taking Loki on frequent walks around the neighbourhoods - that kind of stuff.  

I realize that my stress level has gone way WAY down since I left my former job.  It was to be expected, I get that - I just didn't expect it to be as low as it's been these past couple of days.  I think I've halted the hair-turning-white-thing for a little while (PHEW!) and I'm much more at ease.  Spending a few hours at Olympus Spa probably helped, as well as the amount of sleep I'm getting - which has been heavenly.  It's like catching up on a year's worth of sleep!  My body is still freaking out a little bit - wondering what I'm doing ("what is this sleep thing?") and getting used to NOT sitting in a shitty work chair.

Currently I'm on stay-cation right now - dinking about town, seeing friends, and taking care of me, til I go back to the working world next Monday.  I'm avoiding cleaning out the garage, even though that's where I should be right now...oh well.

I should be ready to go back to work by next week - til then, I'm gonna do whatever I damn well please!

Enjoy the sun - cuz that's what I'm gonna do!

Goal

Must.  Stop.  Biting/chewing.  Cuticles.  

If you see me gnawing on my cuticles please slap my hand away.

Thank you.

I think

I often times think I might not be cut out for Human Resources, but it's what I do and I'm good at it - so you'd think I'd stick to what I know right?

I think part of me stays really objective during situations, but another part of me gets a wee emotionally involved and I start to fight for "the little guy" vs fighting for the company I work for.  I get really wrapped up in a situation, especially if it's someone that I like vs someone that's a complete douchebag employee.  Not that that's a bad thing, b/c technically, I'm here for the employees and not necessarily just the company, but still...I wonder if I should try be one of those people that only cares about the company.

HAHAHAHAHAHA
As if.
That's so not me.  I'm always going to be the HR person that fights for the employee - always.  I can't imagine it any other way.  Come to think of it, I think I'm always gonna be the person that fights for the employee regardless of whether or not I'm still in HR.  

Hmmm...I guess I really do care about people.

Riddle me this...

why why WHY do nice restaurants always have TV's in their bar areas?  WHY?  What is the point?  

With the exception of places like Mistral or Lark, I was shocked to see TV's at Palace Kitchen.  WTF?

It appears that almost every place I've been to for dinner - BAM!  There's a TV.  It just doesn't make sense to me - TV's in a restaurant says "sports bar" to me.  The last thing I want to see is some bloody sporting event on the tube when I'm trying to carry on a conversation or eat my meal.  It's distracting and really, aren't we surrounded by enough technological shit as it is?   

TV's - ok in your media room, living room, a sports bar or hell, any Irish bar for that matter, but in a nice restaurant?  NO.  Take those things out and replace them with some nice art.  Or a blank wall. 

**pic from nontoxin.com

Reminiscing...

...and not about something glamourous or good, either.

I'm in an HR seminar all week in Portland and this afternoon we talked about interviewing candidates, strategic planning, recruiting, blah blah blah.

Many years ago (ok, 5 or 6 to be exact), when I first moved to Seattle, I was interviewing for jobs...normal day jobs, after becoming disillusioned by the massage world and realizing that I needed to eat and pay rent.

So I registered w/ a staffing firm and they sent me on an interview at a travel site's corporate office, where I'd be interviewing for an online marketing position.  Mind you, I knew v little about that at the time, but figured I'd give it a shot and, at the very least, practice my interviewing skills.  

Why not, right?

WRONG.

I went in, and started answering questions the best way I knew how.  I knew I wasn't going to be offered the position, but like I said, it was perfect for me to practice!  

There were a few questions I didn't know the answer to, so I explained to this to the panel.

At one point, one of the interviewers leans forward and says, "Define obscure."

*blink blink*

I stared at him.  I knew what he was getting at - he figured I had no idea what I was talking about during the interview...which I really didn't, but that was plain rude.  I remember the exact moment too - his face, his demeanor (he was already condescending after he read thru my resume), his shitty preppy outfit.  I also remember his cohorts (there were 4 total) actually SNICKERING after he asked me.  Out of the 4 douchebags, only 1 looked like he felt kind of bad for me. 

I wound up getting a job elsewhere and since then, have continued to work in pretty awesome jobs.  I may not have made it in marketing, but that wasn't what I wanted to do anyway and definitely didn't want to work w/ people like that.

To that guy, I say:

Hey asshole, when your department got slashed over there, I'm pretty sure you lost your job in the process.  Karma's a bitch, huh?  Now who's obscure?

Well THAT'S odd

Ok...so the numb arm thing.  It's moved its way to numb left forefinger.  Wha happen...?

It's the weirdest sensation - you know what I'm talking about if you've ever slammed your fingers in a door or dropped something on your big toe and it goes numb for a bit before the pain sets in?  That's what my finger feels like - only w/ no pain.  Just numbness.  

It's been going on for about 3 weeks now.  It doesn't bother me, it's just...weird.  

Anyone else had this before?  

My arm

So you might've read about how I'd like someone to bring me a bionic arm (below).

I'm serious.  

Maybe a bionic shoulder blade too.  Or shoulder blade muscle.

I think I've figured out what the hell's wrong w/ my left arm...

I noticed that when I'm at work it's sore.  Uncomfortable.  Like I need to just keep stretching all day (not a bad thing, actually, I could do that all day).  Or rather like I want to tear my left scapula out of my body.  Extreme, I know, but right now, I think it might actually FEEL good.

Ergonomics.  I don't haz them here at work.  My desk is made for someone that's 5'9" and I'm 5' nothin.  I don't even think my office knows what ergonomics really is b/c everyone I see is sitting improperly - keyboards up too high, seats too low, slumped over, twisting in all different directions.

It's like a workman's comp claim just waiting to happen.  And when I bring it up, I'm returned with a mouthbreathing blank stare.


What do I do?  Any suggestions?

WHEEEEE!

Kind of lame that blogger won't let me post a video, so here's the link instead:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/41968425@N00/4497769203/

BEST.  CLASS.  EVAR.

I'm totally going back.  

Anyone?  Anyone?


**yes, I look like a little midget on a trapeze, I know this.

Please to be bringing me

a bionic arm.

KTHXBAI.

Whoops

Occasionally I forget that I have this blog too.  I need to steer away from my private-you-can't-read-this blog and concentrate on this one.

Ok then.

Here I am.

Nothing new to report except that I signed up for a 2 hour FLYING TRAPEZE class in April, bitches!  That's right, yours truly sooooaaaaaring thru the air, pretending to be part of Cirque du Soleil...only not really b/c I'm way more out of shape than those kids.

YAY!  I'm so excited right now that I want it to start RIGHT THIS SECOND!  
I've done skydiving, acrobalancing, and of course fire, so why not try something else, right?

Who says you can't be adventurous at 40?  I will vag punch that person!

sigh...

And on that note, I leave you with this photo: 







**that's me at the Museum of Natural History, hugging it out w/ a giant sea turtle.

Did I miss the train or memo on this?

I swear to Buddha if one more person asks me why I'm not married or why I don't have kids AT MY AGE I'm going to clobber them.
Is it necessary?  Do women have to be married with children in order to feel whole?
Yeah, I didn't think so either.
So to all you women out there freaking out about not having either, I say this:
IT'S NOT THE END OF THE FUCKING WORLD!

There is more to life than marriage and children.

Like puppies, for example.  Who doesn't love a puppy?

sigh

I just read yet another chick lit book about the woes of women being in their late 20s and turning 30...blah blah blabbity blah BLAH.

Give.  Me.  A.  Break.  

Really?  REALLY?  You're worried about turning 30?  Are you JOKING?

I'm tired of reading books and blogs that talk about how turning 30 (or being in your mid-30s) is such a bad thing - the "Boo I'm not married" or "I have no kids" or "It's just me and my fucking cat".  

GET OVER IT, LADIES!

Guess what?  We all AGE.  We all get older.  Some of us choose to get older gracefully, while others go on a shitstorm rampage and fuck it up for the rest of us that are doing the graceful thing.  

I'm not one of those women.

I've decided to start a(nother) blog - and this one I'm not going to put on "private" mode.  This one will be open for all to see, read, and comment on.  This blog will be a blog about the musings of a 40 (something) year old.

BTW, I still get carded.  

Are you 40 or on your way to/in your 4th decade?  How do YOU feel?  

Do tell.